1 Pink Candle
Lavender Petals (I grow my own and use about 3 "stalks" works)*
Jasmine Flower (just a hand full will do)*
5-10 pieces of Rose Quartz
A bowl of Salt Water
A small mirror
An altar cloth in red, pink or white (really use what ever color makes you happy but these are the "preferred" colors) DO NOT SKIP THIS STEP - it makes clean up sooooo much easier.
* mix these 3 ingredients together
Using your normal practice, set up your area.
Take a cleansing/purifying bath
Set up the Altar - see below notes
Lay down the altar cloth
Place the pink candle in the center
Place the rose quartz pieces equidistant to each other in a circle around the candle. (as you set each crystal visualize yourself coming closer to the person you wish to be)As you place each crystal around th unlit candle visualize yourself coming closer to an authentic version of you.
On the outside of the crystal ring sprinkle generous amounts of the flower/glitter mixture. (as you sprinkle ask for the wisdom to aide in this working).
Sit in meditation for a few minutes.
Dip the washcloth into the salt water and gently scrub your face, hands, feet in the salt water. See the road blocks to a healthy relationship and the residue of bad relationships wash off like oil and dirt.
After scrubbing, envision healing energy washing over your body, healing the damage from those past remaining.
Light candle, meditate on the flame and when guided to, say: “By sacred flame I ignite the passion of the Goddess. Hear me great mother!”
Touch each stone gently, say: “By sacred stone I summon the love of the Goddess. Hear me great mother!”
Let your finger tips graze the herbs, say: “By sacred flower I call forth the spirit of the Goddess. Hear me great mother!”
Sit in silent meditation, feel the energy around you. See if anything has shifted. If you are led to cry, cry. If you are led to yell, yell (as long as you are not disturbing any one. If you are led to dance, dance. Listen to what your body and gut are telling you. Spill your heart out to the Goddess, she is a good secret keeper.
Once you have released all stickiness, say: “No more tears will blind me, no more fears will chain me. No more pieces to find within, no more pain to keep within.”
Turn around so that the candle is behind you and lift up your mirror and stare directly into your own gaze. Just look at yourself, when you feel the time is right, say: “Looking back I see my soul not pieces to be made whole. Looking in I see my heart is a lush work of ancient art. Looking out I see my path free of self inflicted wrath. (Insert your full name), I love you and you are worthy of love.”
Set the mirror down gently, turn back to face the candle one last time, say" “Queen of Heaven, Queen of Hell, horned Hunter of the night, please lend your power to this spell and work my will by magic right. Air to speed it well, earth to bind my spell, water to cleanse each cell, fire to light the the dwell, I count the elements four fold and on the fifth my spell shall hold! May my heart be mine for all time. My love is mine for all time. I cast this spell, so must it be, for the good of all, but most for me!”
- Do you currently have a Big? I do - My Bunny
- What age do you identify as? I don't identify as a specific age
- Do you identify as a little girl or a little boy? little girl
- Do you have an area in your home for little space? Not a set space, Bunny makes me a blanket fort when I go little
- Pacifier- yes or no? Nope
- Top 3 favorite little cartoons: Brave, Hotel Transylvania, Ferngully
- Who's your favorite stuffie? That I can snuggle with - Nightshade, that is to old to play wif anymore - Theodore Edward Bear aka Ted E Bear
- What do you call your Big? I answered this already, but he be my Bunny
- What's the last picture you colored? Butterflies
- How many stuffies do you have? 15
- Whats your favorite little space meal? Actual food - pizza rolls/Not food - chocolate
- How do you dress up for little space? I don't really dress up, I want to, but haven't found anything to wear that's plus size
- Who in your life knows about your lifestyle? I think everyone is aware that I has little tendancies, but not sure how many people really know
- Markers, crayons or colored pencils? All of the above
- Do you have a blankie? Nope
- Whats your favorite little space drink? Water
- Have you ever been on a playdate with another little? Nope - pout
- What do you love most about your Big? He makes me feel little
- Do you use punishments in your house? If so, what? Bunny keeps saying we are going to, but he hasn't set any up yet
- Whats your favorite board or card game? Go Fish
- Do you like pet play? Haven't tried it yet
- Do you have a collar? Nope - Bunny hasn't bought one yet
- Whats your partners nickname for you? BabyGirl & Voodoo Doll
- Top 3 kinks/turn ons? Spanking, Choking, Rough Play of all kinds
- Best way to cheer you up when you're grumpy pants? Cartoons, snuggles, and blankie fort
- Level 1 - $25 license cost - basic street walker, only allowed to service clients on the street (alleys) or vehicle
- Level 2 - $50 license cost - all of the above - allowed to service clients in rent by the hour hotels
Wow - I wasn't sure I would make it to see the new year. The past month or so has been OMG crazy hard, but I did it. I survived.
Gotta say my new year resolutions are not a thing this year - I'm getting back to my daily workouts/eating healthy but that's a continuation of my journey to a better version of me. I'm pretty much just going to work on some type of creative process daily (today being my Bujo - pics to follow) but some days it will be mixed media art, some days knitting, some days clay work, some days jewelry. By the end of the year I'm hopeful to have enough to open an Etsy store or a booth downtown - we shall see.
I'm also looking forward to making some actual journals and getting that process perfected.
What was amazing in 2016? In 2016 - I realized that I had the true mind of an artist and I showed it to the world in the many art projects I worked on, the fence mural that I pained, the purse I did, the prosthetics I made for the Zombie Walk. I walked my own path and while not ecstatic where I landed, I am at peace with it.
What did you do in 2016 that you’re proud of? Stood up for myself with my parents.
What do you learn/discover that you want to bring into 2017? I discovered that it's okay to be a list making Virgo google queen. And I will wear that badge with honor.
What do you want to leave behind in 2016? Headaches & malcontents
What are you most grateful for about 2016? That it is over.
How did your dreams grow in 2016? I don't think I did such a good job growing my dreams this year. Perhaps I'll do better in 2017.
What did you do to help your dreams grow in 2016? I don't know how to answer this question. I talked - a lot.
Is there anything you need to do to complete your year? Any unfinished business that you’d like to finish, and leave behind as you move into 2016? I would really like to have it out with a few ex friends & family. I would like to rip them a new one and let them know how much the ghosting & abandonment hurt.
2017What is your Big Dream for 2017? To make each day a magical filled day, to continue my journey with a happier heart and even bigger dreams.
Why do you want this? Because I have to have magic in my life
How will you feel when you have it? The biggest reason I want this in my life is because of joy. I want to feel joy again.
Do you already know how to make this dream real, or is this something you need to learn more about first? Reality baby
What’s your plan for giving this dream what it needs to thrive in 2017?
I think the one thing that I need to focus on this year is self. I always say that self means the most to anyone because that is where everything else starts, but every year I fail at treating myself like a good person. I am mean & nasty to me all the time and that needs to stop.
2. What's the most humanly impossible thing you will do this year?
Loose weight - I am determined that while I am happy being a curvy female, I am not happy with my overall health AND that needs to stop, now.
3. What's the single most important thing you could do to improve the quality of your family life this year?
Let it go - I am such a family girl that it is really hard for me to remember to take the time out to take care of me. I let my guilt get in the way CONSTANTLY. I think if I was happier, then my interactions with family would be happier and thus improved.
4. In which spiritual discipline do you most want to make progress this year, and what will you do about it?
This year I will celebrate all the Sabbaths and Esbaths, even if I am celebrating alone.
5. What is the single biggest time-waster in your life, and what will you do about it this year?
Depression sleep and I am going to do my very best to eat healthy & exercise & take care of myself so that pit doesn't attack as often.
6. What is the most helpful new way you could strengthen your tribe?
Continue my solitude for another year. I am not in the correct mindset to join/find a physical tribe right now.
7. What circle work are you most looking forward to this year?
8. What are the most important ways you will be making this year different from last year?
- Incorporating little time into my schedule
- Adding to my BuJo
- Naming & silencing my inner critic
9. What one thing could you do to improve your spiritual life this year?
I need to revisit mini rituals
10. What single thing that you plan to do this year will matter most in 10 years?
You know - the news montage from 2016 has been like the start of some really mucked up movie about how the world ended:
- Oregon militia crazies took over but were begging people for snacks
- Donald Trump for President
- Record breaking snow storms in the northeast that stranded a fuck ton of people on the freaking roads/Record breaking cold snaps across the rest of the world
- David Bowie dies
- Alan Rickman too
- Black Lives Matter/Blue Lives Matter/All Lives Matter - but the shootings just don't stop
- Prince dies
- Random shootings
- Clowns - WTF - Clowns!!!!!
- North Korea launching rockets
- Passenger trains colliding in Germany
- Ohio state slaughtered Harembee
- Lightworkers suck
- More random shootings
- Black Lives Matter/Blue Lives Matter/All Lives Matter - but the shootings never stop
- Donald Trump wins election
- The world looses its shit
- Gene Wilder & Leonard Cohen die
But that isn't really an option now is it? So as someone who loves to live in the happy bubble that I have created for myself, I've decided to take the week between Christmas and New Years to hit the restart button, so that I can go into 2017 with a bit more peace of mind.
- Monday - I am going to be acknowledging *ALL* of the past year, all of the things that have led me to the here & now. I will be writing them in my journal
- the lessons I've learned (never read the comments),
- the blessings (a good nap),
- the pain (all the hurt and anger),
- the friends I've said goodbye to (both the real life friends and the entertainers)
- Tuesday - will be a day of release. And by release I mean I'm starting a huge ass bonfire and I am dumping each and every burden into it. This way I can acknowledge each item and feel that pain lift from me. To do this, I will be writing on individual strips of paper anything that has hurt me this year, then I will say it out loud and then discard it into the fire while saying "You have no power over me". As each slip burns away the written letters & paper that binds it, it burns away in me as well. Get rid of it, don't hold it for fuel for your fire, just burn it away now. Let IT GO!!!
- Comparison especially in my art
- Anger over the missed vacation
- Wednesday - will be a day of cleaning, it's time to lighten your load - physically, mentally and spiritually. When I say throw it out, you could always donate it or give it away, but what ever you do - get it out of your life TODAY!!!
- If it’s broken - throw it out
- If it doesn’t work - throw it out
- If it is missing parts - throw it out
- If you don’t use it - throw it out
- If it’s unfinished - throw it out
- Thursday - will be my day of gratitude. A day to thank the Universe for all it has provided. A day to celebrate the good. I will leave offerings out today, and very likely dance to the noon day sun as a way of showing gratitude because we were given the David Bowies & Robin Williams & glitter & sparkles & coffee!
- Leave offerings to the Universe
- Friday - today is the day to declare who I want to be in 2017 and what I will be manifesting in my life. Sit down with yourself & your journal and claim the pieces of who you want to be!
- Envision the changes you want to make
- Announce it.
- Write it down.
- Own it.
- Create a mental imprint of your future
- Saturday - It's time to take a step in the right direction!
- Create a wall hanging using my word of the year for 2017!
- Make a list of positive actionable steps to achieve my goals
- Create a mantra for my daily life